A year ago today, my best good buddy Choca died in my arms. Many of you were part of my community here at the time and remember it. It kicked off a year of loss: our dog, our unborn baby, my job. This is why I was convinced Sassy wouldn't make it to 2022. Choca was my hiking partner for many years, and because she never said anything, I came to enjoy silence rather than the adrenaline and distractions of my life off the mountains. I think my career in TV news eventually ended because of that - as the silence allowed me self-relfection, which brought self-awareness, and with it, awareness of the world around me. Choca's death was a violent one in the sense that natural death, I've heard, isn't always how movies depict it. This was the first time I'd ever been there for a last breath and for months after it, I woke up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat and had other unexplained health problems. This may seem an odd reaction, but as a child I accompanied my doctor parents to hospitals and witnessed sickness and dying at a very young age. Avoiding death, while trying to understand it, became a driving motivation for me. Perhaps it is, in part, why I went to seminary and eventually became a reporter. I sought distraction from my own mortality while also seeking to control it through knowledge. A losing combination. In the book he wrote about his wife's death, CS Lewis said, "No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid." That was my experience. And I had no choice but to sit through it. Then to confront it again and again throughout the rest of the year. But as I sat quietly, I realized something. I had believed that if I could unlock the secrets of death and finally come to peace with it- the ultimate question of existence that has eluded philosophers for centuries - I would finally come to know God. Instead, after last year, I now believe that I had gotten it backwards. Instead, it is coming to know God that brings one peace about death (and all other things for that matter). And thus begins a new journey, not of the head but of the heart. I'll end with another quote from a favorite Lewis book, the last lines of Til We Have Faces, “I ended my first book with the words 'no answer.' I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice? Only words, words; to be led out to battle against other words. Long did I hate you, long did I fear you.” Blessings to all of you on your journey. Thank you for being a part of mine.
We did it. We fought telecom and won. An industry worth trillions of dollars with copious federal protections. Just one ex-TV reporter and my motley crew of friends along with our rural middle class neighborhood. The Citrus County Planning & Development Commission denied the permit for the cell tower proposed next to our farm. What an incredible day.
This is likely not the end. There could be a federal lawsuit. The attorney could resubmit for a shorter tower. For now though, we celebrate - or nap.
This morning I was puking my guts up from stress, praying that God would get me through this day. The benefit of a situation like this is that it allows us to confront every identity we believe limits or defines us and watch God do the work. An old family friend and pastor told me once that courage is not lack of fear - it is acting despite it. It hit me a while back that it matters less what happens with the cell tower than how I react to it. “What does it profit a man to gain the world (or ...
We are two days away from our cell tower hearing before the Citrus County Planning & Development Commission. I am representing our neighborhood and over the last several months I have had to become an attorney, RF engineer, community activist, journalist, land use planner - all while living the wife, mom and farm life.
Thank you to everyone who has written our county voicing their opposition! If you haven’t done so yet, please take 25 seconds and send an email to: [email protected] and tell her “I oppose the Cell Tower application CU 2026-00003, please deny the conditional use permit. It is incompatible with the height limitations of the surrounding neighborhood and the applicant has not proven a significant gap in coverage.”
If you live in the area, please join us at 9A on October 1 and at the Lecanto government building: 3600 W Sovereign Path, Lecanto, FL. Let’s do this! 💪🚫
We made the deadline to get in our presentation to STOP the cell tower proposed right next to our farm. Taking on telecom is not for the faint of heart - or really anyone with anything better to do. It’s a full time job and has been a real challenge for me both mentally and spiritually. But I am already grateful for the learning experience and for all of the help I’ve received along the way.
Our hearing before the Planning and Development Commission is Thursday, October 1 - one week away! Please help us, wherever you are, by sending a quick email to [email protected] “I oppose the Blue Sky Cell Tower application CU-2026-00003. Please deny the conditional use permit.” THANK YOU to everyone who has already written!
I keep my brain sharp despite the chaos with the fermented cod liver/concentrated butter oil from Green Pasture. You get 10% off with promo code “ALISON” at check out. https://greenpasture.org/
